Normally, I do not like venting any frustration here, but it seems that, to other people, I have been acting less than happy these days. The reason is that I lost my grandmother, she was quite important to me as she was the woman who raised me. She took me in when I was in the Fifth grade. I had been in a foster home for close to two years and these people weren't precisely the vision of kind and caring. Well, the guy was, he was nice to me, the woman and her children constantly made fun of me, too things away from me for absolutely no reason, and broke my toys[I didn't have much to begin with, my mother *when I visited* had bought for me a Digimon digivice which was much like those little Tomogachi pets. They legit ostracized me until I shared with the girl who wanted to play with it. I don't have an issue with sharing, I have an issue with people returning my things in worse shape than a scrap of junk.]. ANNNYway, my grandmother received a very hellish child, I mean, I was an unnatural nightmare. Still, she was patient, raised me, and supported my artwork, even if she wasn't a big fan of the anime I drew back in the day, she still made sure I had sketchbooks and the things I needed to make good artwork. She inspired me to get better grades in school and really apply myself [When I was in the foster home I was barely passing with Ds, not because I was unable to do the work, but because people wouldn't really stop and teach me how to do something, I felt like my grades and future were not important and retreated to drawing my Card Captor Sakura/ sailor moon/ Yugioh/ and G Gundam world. ] I learned from her that I didn't have to ignore my grades and not draw, because I mean, drawing and art is the only passion I really had, but then I had one for learning. And, as you can see, I am still getting an education, I hope to complete a master's degree in order to become a professor at a college after I spend so many years teaching highschool and middleschool. But, I digress, my grandmother loved me very much and always was doing something for someone else. I didn't really appreciate her in life, and now it feels like an empty household. Losing someone, in my experience, feels like thinking you know your home and when you walk around in the dark, you either miss a step or trip over a step, thinking that it was or was not there. And when you do, you feel this sick feeling at the pit of your stomach as you frantically try to gather your own thoughts. In other words, if there is someone you love, very much, as I did my grandma [which might as well have been my mother] you want them to live forever, but they won't, so appreciate and savor each and every last second you have with that person.